(NOTE: The "words" swag and YOLO are not words in the English language, they're words in the "I'm a complete dumbass that wants to set human evolution 10,000 years back" language.)
For much of my life, people have been throwing around the word "mature" as if it were the most important thing in human existence. Sadly, mature is a word that has been raped to death by the majority of society, and instead of representing actual maturity, a lot of people are trying to attain this faux version of it which really just says "I'm only doing this to look cool to my friends, not because I actually want to grow up and be a good person." Since when did maturity become a race to look cool to your friends, rather than a journey towards self-actualization? Oh, right, that was just me having high expectations for humanity.
This kind of mentality usually follows this format: "I'm more mature than (insert name of person I don't like here), (s)he's (insert personality trait I don't like here), and therefore, (insert name of person I don't like here) is immature, and therefore none of you should be friends with (insert name of person I don't like here)." It's pretty much every reason to look mature in an ad lib format. For example: "I'm more mature than Justin Bieber. She's a shitty pop artist with zero talent, and therefore, Justin Bieber is immature, and therefore none of you should be friends with Justin Bieber."
The logic is hilariously broken here, seeing as gaining the approval of your friends is really not mature at all because you're living up to the standards of somebody else (as opposed to your own standards, which an actual mature person would follow). The last time I did something to gain the approval of my friends was probably when I was in 9th grade and wore Axe cologne. That was a signal for me to stop trying to impress everybody else.
Sadly, kids want to be mature nowadays, yet gain the approval of their friends at the same time. This is a recurring theme in adolescence. You're not mature if you want the approval of your friends; you're sheep. For those who choose to remain kids throughout adulthood (there's quite a few of them) by touting the word "mature" around to impress your friends: you're dumbasses. You can't call someone immature just to try to impress your friends. Wouldn't your real friends like you for who you are, rather than like you for trying to follow your own warped version of "maturity"? Thought so.
That being said, it's difficult to really become "mature". We should stop abusing this word and look for more meaningful ways to evaluate each other as people, and maybe learn some other words in the English language while we're at it.
Tuesday, October 9, 2012
The art of condescension.
The latest Presidential debate and the ensuing political firestorms on Facebook that happened as a result of people (both Democrat and Republican) screaming "MY GUY IS BETTER THAN YOUR GUY LOL" was really just something I did not want to deal with. That's all it really was. Although there were pockets of intelligent discussion, usually centering on how shitty of a moderator Jim Lehrer was, a lot of people started the equivalent of World War III wherever they could, acting like their whole family was recently murdered and taking it out on everyone possible, and in all honesty, it got nowhere fast. This then diluted the possibility of any intelligent discussion that would have taken place, and effectively dashed the chances of there being civility in any political discussion.
Then, I came up with an idea: that condescension was really just a form of art. Now why do I call it an "art" and not as something, as most psychologists say, that says that you're so insecure about yourself that you have to look down on everyone to make yourself feel better? It's simple: there are situations where condescension is completely uncalled for (looking down on crippled people, homosexuals, and women just because of who they are) and situations where it's completely justified (someone believing in young earth creationism when scientific evidence largely points to the contrary, people branding our soldiers as "murderers", thinking Obama is a Muslim, socialist, or a Muslim socialist, PETA opening their mouth, ever). The art of condescension is rather simple: you don't look down on someone for what they are; you look down on what they think. Just because you have a different opinion doesn't necessarily make it a good one. I could recall hundreds of times when this happened and I was criticized for calling people out on their bullshit, usually in the form of people telling me to watch what I say or the usual "well, that's just like, your opinion, man." Of course it's my opinion, was it somebody else that I'm magically pulling the strings on?
A lot of people think that condescension is this horrible, awful thing that should never be done. Everyone looks down on something. Heck, my parents look down on me for one reason or another, and I'm sure at one point, yours have too. It's what we look down on that makes it "acceptable" and "unacceptable". This is just my take on it. As for the politics, bring it on. I'm quite a reasonable person politically, and anyone who has met me knows that.
So to wrap things up: it's not so much who you are (unless you're a neo-Nazi/white supremacist), it's what you're saying. Learn the difference, accept it, and be happy.
Bracing myself for the inevitable "BUT YOU'RE WRONG BECAUSE FUCK YOU" backlash.
Then, I came up with an idea: that condescension was really just a form of art. Now why do I call it an "art" and not as something, as most psychologists say, that says that you're so insecure about yourself that you have to look down on everyone to make yourself feel better? It's simple: there are situations where condescension is completely uncalled for (looking down on crippled people, homosexuals, and women just because of who they are) and situations where it's completely justified (someone believing in young earth creationism when scientific evidence largely points to the contrary, people branding our soldiers as "murderers", thinking Obama is a Muslim, socialist, or a Muslim socialist, PETA opening their mouth, ever). The art of condescension is rather simple: you don't look down on someone for what they are; you look down on what they think. Just because you have a different opinion doesn't necessarily make it a good one. I could recall hundreds of times when this happened and I was criticized for calling people out on their bullshit, usually in the form of people telling me to watch what I say or the usual "well, that's just like, your opinion, man." Of course it's my opinion, was it somebody else that I'm magically pulling the strings on?
A lot of people think that condescension is this horrible, awful thing that should never be done. Everyone looks down on something. Heck, my parents look down on me for one reason or another, and I'm sure at one point, yours have too. It's what we look down on that makes it "acceptable" and "unacceptable". This is just my take on it. As for the politics, bring it on. I'm quite a reasonable person politically, and anyone who has met me knows that.
So to wrap things up: it's not so much who you are (unless you're a neo-Nazi/white supremacist), it's what you're saying. Learn the difference, accept it, and be happy.
Bracing myself for the inevitable "BUT YOU'RE WRONG BECAUSE FUCK YOU" backlash.
Wednesday, October 3, 2012
Proof that God exists: the good edition.
(UPDATES: Person Of The Week/Douche Of The Week will not be continuing, but I have something else in mind. Stay tuned.)
Caught you with my title, did I? This basically spawned off of something I was talking with a friend of mine on Facebook with. I casually said that something that happened to a person I know was proof that God exists and that there are miracles, albeit sarcastically. When I was in high school, I basically was being indoctrinated into some hardcore variant of the Catholic religion and got completely turned off by it. In all honesty, I did feel bad for these people; they were homeschooled (yes, a blog post about homeschooling is in the works), but that sympathy vanished a long time ago.
They used some weird roundabout logic to prove the existence of God (those who study religion know these arguments as apologetics), but really, these people should just apologize to me for wasting my time and really just making me a bitter, cynical, and angry human being (not so much bitter and angry as cynical, though). I don't hate Christianity. I don't hate God. In fact, I believe in God, and I think Christianity is a wonderful message if applied properly. But that argument is for another time and place.
Here are some simpler, more logical proofs that God exists and that there are miracles.
1. Carson Daly is still employed
Everyone knows Carson Daly as the former host of Total Request Live, which was pretty much the show of choice if you were/had one the following:
1. No taste in music
2. Only listened to X artist/band because all your friends listened to X artist/band
3. Between the ages of 12 and 17
TRL mercifully ended when I was in middle school in 2002, but Carson Daly just won't go away: there's even an entire blog dedicated to getting Carson Daly off of all forms of media possible. How Carson Daly managed to stay employed throughout the 2000s and into the 2010s, is proof that God exists and that there are miracles.
2. Snooki has a kid
I often console my friends with this simple quote: "If you think your life sucks, remember that someone has to go through life as Snooki's kid." I think that that simple fact will prevent people from committing suicide, because, hey, someone has to go through life as Snooki's kid, and there's a 99.9% chance that it isn't you (and if Snooki's kid eventually reads this blog, sorry, dude). I highly suggest all suicide prevention hotlines use this line when talking someone out of suicide. It will make your job a whole lot quicker and easier, because who would want to go through life as Snooki's kid, seriously?
Snooki is probably the most annoying invention of the late 2000s/early 2010s, and that's a big understatement (namely because doing it justice would stretch into the entire post, and this is a collection of proofs that God exists). A quote from Snooki herself: "There will always be a Jersey Shore. It will be in the dictionary."
Fun fact: show's now cancelled, and it's famous for all the wrong reasons. People destined to be relegated to being known as anomalies of the gene pool became paid more than doctors, teachers, and firefighters combined do in a single year, per episode. Proof that God exists and that there are miracles.
3. Skrillex is a successful artist
I've heard various things about Skrillex: that his music sounds like a fart on max reverberation and that he sounds like a dial-up modem being two main criticisms. I honestly think Skrillex's music was made by a monkey learning Garage Band by whacking on the keyboard a lot and bang, Skrillex. Proof that God exists and that there are miracles.
4. Obama has a Nobel Peace Prize
For those of you who are like "BUT JOSE OBAMA MADE THE WORLD A SAFER PLACE TO LIVE IN LOL", here's some people who have never won a Nobel Peace Prize: Mahatma Gandhi (12 time nominee), Pope John Paul II, and Eleanor Roosevelt. What are they known for? Oh, gaining independence for a country with over one billion without firing a single shot (Gandhi), doing more for interfaith relations than any previous Pope in history (John Paul II), and advancing women's rights during a time when women's rights was the punch line for a joke (Roosevelt).
Regardless of what side you may be on politically, we can all universally agree that these three did plenty to advocate for world peace, civil rights and equality for all. Actor Jon Lovitz, who votes Democrat, thinks that Obama didn't deserve it either.
Although Obama removed key threats to global security such as Osama bin Laden, he's still not worthy of a Nobel Peace Prize, but was given one anyway. Proof that God exists and that there are miracles.
5. Kristen Stewart is a successful actress
Kristen Stewart has got to be this huge joke the film industry is playing on everybody, seeing as she never changes facial expressions and pretty much ruins acting for people who are actually good at acting.
Granted, all her films are commercial successes due to sheep opening their wallets up wide for the latest Twilight release, but honestly, can anyone name a movie Kristen Stewart was in that wasn't Twilight? Here is a list of Kristen Stewart movies, and they all range from sucktastic (that shitty Flintstones movie where they go to Vegas, Catch that Kid, a blatant rip-off of Agent Cody Banks, which also sucked), to average (Panic Room, Into The Wild). I'm no movie expert, but Kristen Stewart being a successful actress has got to be proof that God exists and that there are miracles.
6. The Simpsons being on the air for 24 seasons (and counting)
If this show was hosted on a network not as big as FOX, it would probably be off the air in maybe 8, 9 years tops. But somehow, the show manages to keep hanging on despite the fact that it's:
1. No longer funny
2. No longer relevant (Probably worse than not being funny, but that's just me)
3. No longer realistic (I know it's supposed to be an animated cartoon, but seriously)
The Simpsons, a great artifact of 90s culture, should have stayed in the 90s, not be dragged across three different decades in an attempt to stay relevant. Proof that God exists and that there are miracles.
And last, but not least:
7. This woman getting married
Some of you know who she is, so I won't mention her by name. But my mother taught me how to stand up for myself because she lived through a dictatorship and martial law, where standing up for yourself meant going to prison or "disappearing". So I take my First Amendment rights to extreme proportions, and that can anger people, which can be enjoyable but at the same time cause a lot of unintended consequences.
A lot of people would love to get married, but seriously, slow the fuck down. In all honesty, I really feel bad for her husband, but he loves her, so that's the cross he must bear. Nothing wrong with getting married early, and you'd think that marriage would change someone, right? Keep in mind that this all happened after she got fatter than she already was (not that I don't mind curves on a woman, but she kind of looks like a female dwarf from World of Warcraft), and still maintained that awful, horrible personality.
Things she has said to me:
1. I wasn't gong to make any friends (I did, and made way more than I probably had expected to, and got a lot of the old ones back, while she told me she wanted nothing to do with me or anybody else, in a fit of selfishness)
2. I was spoiled and my parents gave me everything (Truth is, yes, but this is coming from probably the most sheltered human being in existence)
3. I was "possessed by the devil" (I've actually become the better person because of that whole ordeal, and didn't need to be "possessed by the devil" or "find God" to do so. I already found God, sorry that it isn't yours but mine's pretty cool)
Lots of other bullshit too, but let's remember that no one is perfect. It's one thing to have personality defects; it's another to not want to fix them.
Caught you with my title, did I? This basically spawned off of something I was talking with a friend of mine on Facebook with. I casually said that something that happened to a person I know was proof that God exists and that there are miracles, albeit sarcastically. When I was in high school, I basically was being indoctrinated into some hardcore variant of the Catholic religion and got completely turned off by it. In all honesty, I did feel bad for these people; they were homeschooled (yes, a blog post about homeschooling is in the works), but that sympathy vanished a long time ago.
They used some weird roundabout logic to prove the existence of God (those who study religion know these arguments as apologetics), but really, these people should just apologize to me for wasting my time and really just making me a bitter, cynical, and angry human being (not so much bitter and angry as cynical, though). I don't hate Christianity. I don't hate God. In fact, I believe in God, and I think Christianity is a wonderful message if applied properly. But that argument is for another time and place.
Here are some simpler, more logical proofs that God exists and that there are miracles.
1. Carson Daly is still employed
Everyone knows Carson Daly as the former host of Total Request Live, which was pretty much the show of choice if you were/had one the following:
1. No taste in music
2. Only listened to X artist/band because all your friends listened to X artist/band
3. Between the ages of 12 and 17
TRL mercifully ended when I was in middle school in 2002, but Carson Daly just won't go away: there's even an entire blog dedicated to getting Carson Daly off of all forms of media possible. How Carson Daly managed to stay employed throughout the 2000s and into the 2010s, is proof that God exists and that there are miracles.
2. Snooki has a kid
I often console my friends with this simple quote: "If you think your life sucks, remember that someone has to go through life as Snooki's kid." I think that that simple fact will prevent people from committing suicide, because, hey, someone has to go through life as Snooki's kid, and there's a 99.9% chance that it isn't you (and if Snooki's kid eventually reads this blog, sorry, dude). I highly suggest all suicide prevention hotlines use this line when talking someone out of suicide. It will make your job a whole lot quicker and easier, because who would want to go through life as Snooki's kid, seriously?
Snooki is probably the most annoying invention of the late 2000s/early 2010s, and that's a big understatement (namely because doing it justice would stretch into the entire post, and this is a collection of proofs that God exists). A quote from Snooki herself: "There will always be a Jersey Shore. It will be in the dictionary."
Fun fact: show's now cancelled, and it's famous for all the wrong reasons. People destined to be relegated to being known as anomalies of the gene pool became paid more than doctors, teachers, and firefighters combined do in a single year, per episode. Proof that God exists and that there are miracles.
3. Skrillex is a successful artist
I've heard various things about Skrillex: that his music sounds like a fart on max reverberation and that he sounds like a dial-up modem being two main criticisms. I honestly think Skrillex's music was made by a monkey learning Garage Band by whacking on the keyboard a lot and bang, Skrillex. Proof that God exists and that there are miracles.
4. Obama has a Nobel Peace Prize
For those of you who are like "BUT JOSE OBAMA MADE THE WORLD A SAFER PLACE TO LIVE IN LOL", here's some people who have never won a Nobel Peace Prize: Mahatma Gandhi (12 time nominee), Pope John Paul II, and Eleanor Roosevelt. What are they known for? Oh, gaining independence for a country with over one billion without firing a single shot (Gandhi), doing more for interfaith relations than any previous Pope in history (John Paul II), and advancing women's rights during a time when women's rights was the punch line for a joke (Roosevelt).
Regardless of what side you may be on politically, we can all universally agree that these three did plenty to advocate for world peace, civil rights and equality for all. Actor Jon Lovitz, who votes Democrat, thinks that Obama didn't deserve it either.
Although Obama removed key threats to global security such as Osama bin Laden, he's still not worthy of a Nobel Peace Prize, but was given one anyway. Proof that God exists and that there are miracles.
5. Kristen Stewart is a successful actress
Kristen Stewart has got to be this huge joke the film industry is playing on everybody, seeing as she never changes facial expressions and pretty much ruins acting for people who are actually good at acting.
Granted, all her films are commercial successes due to sheep opening their wallets up wide for the latest Twilight release, but honestly, can anyone name a movie Kristen Stewart was in that wasn't Twilight? Here is a list of Kristen Stewart movies, and they all range from sucktastic (that shitty Flintstones movie where they go to Vegas, Catch that Kid, a blatant rip-off of Agent Cody Banks, which also sucked), to average (Panic Room, Into The Wild). I'm no movie expert, but Kristen Stewart being a successful actress has got to be proof that God exists and that there are miracles.
6. The Simpsons being on the air for 24 seasons (and counting)
If this show was hosted on a network not as big as FOX, it would probably be off the air in maybe 8, 9 years tops. But somehow, the show manages to keep hanging on despite the fact that it's:
1. No longer funny
2. No longer relevant (Probably worse than not being funny, but that's just me)
3. No longer realistic (I know it's supposed to be an animated cartoon, but seriously)
The Simpsons, a great artifact of 90s culture, should have stayed in the 90s, not be dragged across three different decades in an attempt to stay relevant. Proof that God exists and that there are miracles.
And last, but not least:
7. This woman getting married
Some of you know who she is, so I won't mention her by name. But my mother taught me how to stand up for myself because she lived through a dictatorship and martial law, where standing up for yourself meant going to prison or "disappearing". So I take my First Amendment rights to extreme proportions, and that can anger people, which can be enjoyable but at the same time cause a lot of unintended consequences.
A lot of people would love to get married, but seriously, slow the fuck down. In all honesty, I really feel bad for her husband, but he loves her, so that's the cross he must bear. Nothing wrong with getting married early, and you'd think that marriage would change someone, right? Keep in mind that this all happened after she got fatter than she already was (not that I don't mind curves on a woman, but she kind of looks like a female dwarf from World of Warcraft), and still maintained that awful, horrible personality.
Things she has said to me:
1. I wasn't gong to make any friends (I did, and made way more than I probably had expected to, and got a lot of the old ones back, while she told me she wanted nothing to do with me or anybody else, in a fit of selfishness)
2. I was spoiled and my parents gave me everything (Truth is, yes, but this is coming from probably the most sheltered human being in existence)
3. I was "possessed by the devil" (I've actually become the better person because of that whole ordeal, and didn't need to be "possessed by the devil" or "find God" to do so. I already found God, sorry that it isn't yours but mine's pretty cool)
Lots of other bullshit too, but let's remember that no one is perfect. It's one thing to have personality defects; it's another to not want to fix them.
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